|
[24 Jul 2008|12:53pm] |
So after careful (spur of the moment) consideration I've decided to move to Bellingham. I'm going to become a carpenter while I'm up there.
Save some money.
Hone my skills as a musician.
Skateboard a lot.
Snowboard a lot.
Fuck Seattle. Fuck how expensive everything is. Fuck all the crackheads.
Fuck the everything.
I don't expect to not hate Bellingham after a bit, but at least I will be distracted by moving and learning new skills.
Live in the moment says Mom.
I'm always looking ahead.
Fuck it.
|
|
| Spirited Away |
[24 Jul 2008|12:32pm] |
|
To all my campus pals, Landmark Theatres (Drexel) is going to be playing Spirited Away on August 15 & 16 at Midnight, and the 16th & 17th at Noon. Thought you might like to know.
|
|
|
[24 Jul 2008|08:54am] |
Fuck, i have a doctors appointment at 11, and i need to stay in silverdale until my check comes in at work. Usually around 4.
If you watch the sci fi channel, you know they do 8am-4pm marathons. Today they are doing x-files, and i just want to say fuck it all and stay home and watch it. But i can't :(.
|
|
| Dear friend, |
[24 Jul 2008|08:26am] |
It's horrible how the smallest things
remind you of how in love you really are.
|
|
| cassandra |
[23 Jul 2008|01:01pm] |
cassandra
as brood walked down the nearly empty streets of what was once a prosperous pair of joined kingdoms he could hear sobbing from the end of the street.
very little seemd to matter to brood these days, but these exact sounds sent an alarm to him, so for the first time in longer than he could remember he ran to the end of the road.
-----------------------------------------------------
as they came to the edge of the cliff reckless and grimm could only stand in awe of such an open landscape to finally present itself before them.
reckless: i can see the kingdoms, they are a distance... but depending on how straight a path we can take we may be there within a few days... likely no more than a week.
grimm: the war...
reckless: sir... you look to be in pain?
grimm: i can feel it. it's almost always been a distant pain, but today, right now... maybe due to direct exposure to the kingdoms again, but i can feel it. it's so close, reckless... it's so terribly near.
reckless: do you think we can make it to the kingdoms in time?
grimm: i'm really beginning to wonder. these next few days are going to be a very tight travel.
-----------------------------------------------------
brood neared the end of the street and encountered the cries behind the temple of apollo in the form the six cassandras, a group of women supposedly cursed with prophetic abilities for their lies to men and to the gods. due to their original nature of being pathological liars, the women had always been seen as untrustworthy, so when they received their curse, changing their physical appearances as well as their claimed ability to see the future nearly ten years ago, brood found it easier to confine them to the temple of the god that cursed them, a sadistic punishment for the women already punished enough. following brood's loss of power, the cassandra's imprisonment, along with many other orders brood established, was dropped, leaving the group of women estranged from all but each other for so long to find a life for themselves on the street, a task they could not comprehend.
brood: cassandras... you have always been untrustworthy, you have always been the serpents of tongues, and the possums of action, tell me WHAT, and do not lie, has you so upset at this time?
all six of the women looked at one brood; in agony, one in horror, three in fear, and the final in contempt, the last one was the only willing to speak;
"THE WAR IS COMING! OF THE PAST AND FUTURE-EACH AND EVERYONE OF THEM-THE CASUALTIES ARE ALL ON YOUR HEAD!"
|
|
|
[23 Jul 2008|05:31am] |
|
mona lisa must have the highway blues, i can tell by the way she smiles.
|
|
| Dear friend, |
[23 Jul 2008|04:11am] |
I never knew
I never knew that everything was falling through
That everyone I knew was waiting on a cue
To turn and run when all I needed was the truth
But that's how it's got to be
It's coming down to nothing more than apathy
I'd rather run the other way than stay and see
The smoke and who's still standing when it clears
Learning learning learning.
A student of life.
|
|
|
[23 Jul 2008|02:09am] |
As many people as i know, as many friends as i have.
I have no one i can turn too when i really need it.
I try so hard.
Fuck.
|
|
| a little something i wrote in august of 2004 |
[22 Jul 2008|07:10pm] |
10 reasons why it is hard to keep it real.
1. people are always hating.
2. keeping it real means keeping it real, DOOSHE!
3. sometimes keeping it real may seem like the wrong thing to do when in reality it is the right thing to do.
4. a man once kept it real and now he's rich.
5. a man once kept it real and now he's poor.
6. keeping it real means keeping it real 24/7
7. sometimes in order to keep it real you must interfere with other people keeping it real, but if you really are keeping it real this shouldn't happen.
8. people pretend to keep it real and you get confused.
9. you kept it real once before and it did you little good.
10. keeping it real may not produce immediate results but in the end something cool will happen.
they aren't really specific statements to the topic but you know what, i'm just keeping it real so relax fool. in essence, nobody can tell you who you are. you have to figure that out for yourself.
and in the end i think all that matters here is that we GET THE FUCK OUT OF THIS STUPID WHITE BRED LITTLE TOWN!
i think i was smarter then.
|
|
|
[22 Jul 2008|10:30am] |
I had a good weekend.
Thank you to those that got drunk with me.
Much fun was had.
|
|
| Dear friend, |
[22 Jul 2008|05:47am] |
Cynical to say the least.
Knowing that the phone calls would get fewer and further between was expected.
Knowing the visits would be less personal and fewer also was expected.
I lost my best friend and he's fine with that.
Why doesn't expecting these things take away the pain of them happening?
Sure, I miss the relationship.
Duh.
But losing Mark's friendship was more devastating than all the rest.
How can he be so fine with ignoring me?
When he told me I meant something to him, he must have been lying.
He told me our friendship means something very special to him.
He won't even call me.
Just when you think you've lost it all,
You find out you had so much more you were going to lose.
"Self-expression heals the wounded heart."
It also gets me into trouble.
I wish I could just split into two different people.
My dark half, full of rage and pain,
And my light half, fun and caring.
I would kill my dark half and never feel pain or anger or love ever again.
I would shed all the things I don't like about myself.
Madness madness madness
Or maybe I'll just start flipping a coin to make my decisions.
|
|
| ivory and lose |
[22 Jul 2008|03:05am] |
ivory
Amongst her tribe ivory was a speaker. Capable of speaking not only to
others of her own race, but to animals and even some plant species.
Being a speaker, was not only ivory's blessing, but also a
responsibility and a detriment.
To maintain clarity of mind, ivory needed to communicate with others of
her kind on a regular basis, and therefore could not leave her tribe.
One day while on a swim ivory became ensnared in the middle of abyss
lake, named for it's absence of life. Not too big of a deal, she cried
for help while trying to struggle free, but in her struggles only
managed to fatgue herself quickly, after some time ivory had to rely on
crying for help further, she could see members of her tribe pass by but
nobody would seem to notice her cries for help.
After 5 weeks of crying for help from anyone the waters began to dip
into a great freeze. Though the cooling down was felt for days the
actual freeze over hit in moments, and ivory was trapped beneath the
thick ice.
A year passed by before ivory would see the surface again, and in the
time since the logs that had ensnared her had rotted away enough for her
easy escape.
Ivory would wash up unconcious on the shore of the lake one day being
literally free, but in her mind, ivory would always see through a sheet
of ice and speak with a voice distanced by ten thousand cries followed
by a year of enforced silence.
lose
if you could voluntarily lose all thoughts regarding something-anything, would you choose to do so? you could lose all recollection of a person, an ex, a parent, a difficult family member, a schoolyard bully, or you could throw away a failure in a competition, a question of "what if", or the moments before a catastrophe.
i've had a busy mind as of late, and i can really hate the power of my memory at times, retaining way too much, and reminding me all so often, i've been considering the concept of voluntarily losing memory. it's not possible, that i know of, just a concept i am quite fond of right now. i would like to forget a lot, actually. erase a few years, in fact, of a huge portion of my life. just lose it all, never acknowledge it's existence, and hopefully with that, take away some of the ways it has shaped me as a person.
but as i said before, unfortunately, i know of no way of doing this, and therefore i am stuck with these forever. i only wish those involved would have understood all that time back what would come of things.
so, as i asked above, if you could be allowed to forget anything, would you?
|
|
| its tough being a father. |
[21 Jul 2008|10:14pm] |
just found out that orson has a bladder problem.
very uncommon in young dogs like herself.
i was told by a veterinarian today
that she should be medicated for the rest of her life.
the medication reacts with certain hormones causing bad mood changes.
i told the vet i don't want to medicate her.
but i bought the medicine anyway.
i'm hoping it will go away on its own.
her favorite toy is a stegosaurus.
today we finished mixing a few alligators tracks.
one of which can be heard HERE......>www.myspace.com/alligatorpocketbook
check out
NEW
ALLIGATORS
SONG.
click.
listen.
criticize.
the album should be finished and available for purchase by september.
GET EXCITED!
|
|
|
[22 Jul 2008|08:25pm] |
"I'm learnin' one thing good," she said. "Learnin' it all a time, ever'day. If you're in trouble or hurt or need-- go to poor people. They're the only ones that'll help-- the only ones."
God damned, Steinbeck you're a fucking genius.
and you're right.
poor people ARE the only ones who ever help.
rich folk are (usually) good for nothing more than greed.
|
|
|
[21 Jul 2008|06:27pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
overheating |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
music kyle is playing, |
] |
So yesterday Stephen and I were cleaning up the house and I found a container of something in the fridge and I asked Stephen to find out what it was so I could use the container, and so he opened up the lid and then sat it down and ran to the bathroom and literally threw up. Can you believe that? I didn't know people actually threw up just because something is stinky.
It ended up being a curry veggie thing I made like, oh, maybe, six months ago.
|
|
|
[21 Jul 2008|05:11pm] |
thanks for this great year, great birthday, great love.
:)
|
|
|
[21 Jul 2008|04:45pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 hungry |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Bright Eyes |
] |
So, I woke up this morning and the swelling on my foot came down even more and I can walk with much less of a limp. yes! I still missed the bite of Seattle though, which is very frustrating.
I love the summer.
Last night Stephen and I hosted,what I feel might have been, our best party ever. Stephen's friends are really nice folks. Only 2 of mine came, which is very annoying because I invited 10 or 15, and they all seemed really excited and wiling to come. I don't like people like that. Out of the people I invited I know which ones are really my friends.
Sadly I did end up giving away my kitty. Gwenevere is allot happier as usual. She must really hate all other Animals. I'm kind of sad though. I loved cuddling with Poppy Seed, who's new name is Electric, which Is a stupid name for a cat, and I'm sticking to it. Last night she was scared by all of the people in our house and managed to jump out a window that was really high up. Stephen and I went outside calling her for about 10 minutes until Stephen went inside and I called her for a few moments and then she came to me. I felt really bad giving her away. I've never done that before, it makes me sad.
So I woke up this morning and there were still people here from the night before.They were very polite and didn't outstay there welcome, which is a very nice quality to have. I like people that are polite and have good manners.
I had fun at Stephen's show on Saturday, I'm going to start going to more shows. I've decided that.
|
|
| Dear friend, |
[21 Jul 2008|03:23pm] |
Open your eyes,
Look up to the skies and see
|
|
|
[21 Jul 2008|12:17pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 crazy |
] |
Why do I pointlessly update this thing on a daily basis?
As if I even care what is going in my life.
I hate it when I get the summer time blues.
I should be happy but Im not.
Why do I always want more?
Im tired of being broke.
No money to do anything.
My parents are such air-heads. It's really annoying. They never tell me anything.
I always find out days later and by that point finding out only makes me really mad.
I want to move out again so bad. I need to move out again. I can not stand my family!
THEY ARE DRIVING ME CRAZY.
I need a new job. The kids are cute. The kids are fun. The kids are nice but they are
driving me crazy with all their 'lyra lyra lets go outside' and 'lyra lyra lets play puter' and 'lyra lyra lets play a board game'!!! I dont even like games! I dont even like children!
I NEVER EVER EVER WANT CHILDREN! I need a new job before I go bonkers!
|
|
![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
getrealgav's Friends Page